Training my NFS

Assalamu'alaikum warahmatullahhi wabarakatuh.

How have you been doing? Any progress with the training? :)

In the last post, I was talking about training oneself with a deed or committing oneself to a deed or deeds so that by the end of Ramadhan, hopefully insyaAllah it will become a habit. Ameen.

So I decided to train myself with patience. Oh yes! How trying it has been. But Alhamdulillah, it kinda works somehow. You know that we are not born with it (another brilliant note pointed out by that friend of mine :D ). Imagine a baby. If the baby wants something, really really want it, then the baby will try to get our attention in order that we satisfy its want. If however we are unable to give the baby the attention that it seeks, well what do you think the baby will do? The baby will cry lah. Like, really loud and annoying at an earsplitting tone that you just want to shut the baby up and eventually do what it wants. God, babies do know how to manipulate us. Tsk tsk.

Anyway, so basically, you see… babies don’t have patience. Therefore, it is not something that we are born with; rather it is something that is developed within us as we grow.

You know, there a hadith relating imaan and patience:

“As-sabru minal imaan.”

“Patience is half of imaan.”

So if we could get to train our self with patience, insyaAllah our imaan will eventually rose. Could it also be true the other way round, though? InsyaAllah, wallahu’alam.

But anyway, how do you train yourself with patience? Well, there is lots of way to achieve this. It depends on where you want to inflict the patience; be it in your daily routines, your favourite chores or your habits etc. Me? I choose driving. Why? Well here it goes:

I kind of have an affliction. It’s called NFS – need for speed. It happens whenever I’m driving (apparently, duh!). I don’t know why I have the need but I know that I could not stand driving oh-so s-l-o-w-l-y! Or so I thought, hehe.

So because of this NFS condition that I have, I decided… hey, let’s try it on that! After all, driving too fast is never good and since I ‘could not stand’ it, I shall have to suffer and drive s-l-o-w because I want to be a patient person. And so it began.

I remind myself at all times to drive at moderate speed. Not too slow but again, not as fast as I would normally have. Especially if I am not in a hurry to catch something important. So one day I was driving (duh!). And automatically my foot slammed on the accelerator. Seeing as no car is behind me (therefore no pressure!) and quite a few cars in front of me, I said to myself to slow down a bit. Okay, so I lift my foot off the accelerator – just a bit! But at least I’m progressing. I am fighting my nafs (i.e. nfs) and training myself to be more patient. Whee!

And that went on for quite a while. Few days later, I managed to not have to lift my foot of the accelerator because… I am used to not driving that fast anymore. (Uh, are you bored by now? You should be! :p). But I am still driving at moderate speed. I don’t know if my moderate is somebody’s fast but at least it’s moderate to me. Progress.

And just yesterday, I was driving quite slowly. I even managed to stay on the left lane without having too much of an urge to go to the right lane; all the way from my house to the city centre and then to my grandma’s house. The distance is saying something and I am controlling it! Double whee! Or it could be because it’s raining that day haha, lol. No lah, after a while the rain stopped and I am still driving quite slowly *grins*

So! Have I mastered patience? Well, it’s not a one-off job. It’s a constant thing. Not on just one main action/habit but we need to apply it in our everyday routine. The driving adventure is just an example. Hehe.

Again, it differs with a person. What do you want to train yourself to this Ramadhan? :D

Jaga Diri, Jaga Imaan, Jaga Hati

It's been a while... RAMADHAN KAREEM!

Bismillahhir Rahmaannir Raheem.

Assalamualaikum warahmatullahhi wabarakatuh.

Aloha world out there! It has really been a while, has it not? For that, truly sorry for the absence from us the 6-Thornbankers. Or should I say, ex-6-Thornbankers now? Hehe.

To start with, Ramadhan Kareem to you all! Yes, it is that time of the year again, where MASSIVE sales are everywhere, in every little step that we took, in every small deed that we commit. But of course, profitable only if the intention is Lillahi Taa’la!

I have a confession to make. Okay, before everyone expects something REALLY big about to be told, let me be frank and say… it’s probably nothing to you. Hewhew. Well, it’s just that, I have not been writing much since… ages! Oh my. So pardon me for the simplicity of this post and any following posts that may come. The last piece of decent writing probably would be my last academic assignment. Whoa! Haha. And that is saying a lot, by the way.

So anyhow, I thought I might take up a bit of writing now that I actually had the time to write :S. God knows I’ve been busy! :) But no matter. Here we go:

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As it turns out, I am out of idea of what to write! Or should I say, there’s too much to write that I could not bring myself to settle on one else I shall have to write a jumbled, incoherent piece that no one but me could understand! That would be troublesome then, seeing as I have to explain it again, wouldn’t it? Hmm… let me see!

Ah yes. It’s Ramadhan now, as we all know. I remembered (vaguely) a friend saying something about nafs and our imaan and its connection with the holy month. Well, let me rephrase it to my own. So it goes like this. Our imaan and our nafs are always, ALWAYS conflicting between themselves in our daily life.

For example… like, when a friend/family member invited you to recite the Quran together after Isya’ prayer but at the same time a special show is aired on TV that you just HAVE to watch it at that time because everybody’s talking about it and if you don’t watch it then you’re like… uncool. Boo!

So when our imaan is up, we tend to not follow that inner voice that says “C’mon, just this one time… you know you can always do to that next time.” (Sounds familiar? :O) But when it is otherwise, well should I say more? The inner voice, the oh-so-innocent-but-venomous-voice won. And this is… well this is the lure of the Shaitan that feeds on our nafs, which is to watch the tv. So basically, we’re in constant battle. And let me tell you my friend, if we are not too careful, if we do not spend a little bit of our time to ponder upon these things, we lose. BIG TIME. Sad, I know. Which is why we need to be CONSTANT VIGILANT (hehe, as Professor Moody would say it lol).

Anyway, so again, we’re in constant battle. Sometimes we won, sometimes we lose. I admit the latter has a higher probability of happening than the former, for me. But again, trying is the keyword here. Try not to lose. Oh sorry, let me rephrase that. Try to win! :D

Okay so, this friend of mine… she brought to light this interesting fact that I – and probably most of us – have overlooked! Jazakillahhu khair friend : ) She said, we have 12 months in a year. And in all those months, both our imaan and nafs fight with each other. All the time! But, mashaAllah… As we all know, Allah is the Great Planner, Allah Knows All. He made Ramadhan to be the blessed month, for we know in Ramadhan all Shaaitan are locked up so that we are free to commit ourselves to various deeds that are available. This means, our nafs can be tamed as it does not has its best friend. It’s not easy, I can tell you but it’s a start.

MashaAllah. Interesting, don’t you think? Our nafs has 11 months but we have an extra one month to train our self for the better, to increase our imaan and faith, to tame our nafs so that simple, good deeds that seemed hard to do before will be able to flow easily; just like if before you were a barren piece of land, then after the extra month, you’ll be a fertile piece of land with healthy grass growing on it due to the pouring, descendant flow of the incessant water.

(In case no one gets it, the water equals the good deeds that you attached yourself to, or trained yourself to commit, etc, while the grass is the state of your imaan in your heart.)

SO! One month to do it all, one month for a change, for a better future. Are you up to the challenge?

I’ll tell you about my ‘adventure’ with one of the things that I decided to do in next post, insyaAllah. Pray that I have the time to write it!

Therefore, remember our battle. Remember the formula is constant vigilant. Remember the keyword is to TRY. And remember, fighting our nafs does not equal to a considerable loss but a definite win. InsyaAllah :D

Oh, don’t forget the sale!